summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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