i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
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