i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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