I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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