and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize