Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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