She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
