So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
try to milk me bitch
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
