She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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