i don't like sucking hair
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
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