Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
