I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
