belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize