She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
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