I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
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