If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
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