careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
