just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
