similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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