Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
