do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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