hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
