the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
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