I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Randomize
