I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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