I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
