is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Randomize
