So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Randomize
