Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
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