"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I just got carded by a ten year old.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
