oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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