i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Randomize
