Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
