No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
