Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Who did Billy Mays play for?
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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