i think i have herpe
just one?
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
