Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
