your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
