I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Ladies don't puke and tell
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
