i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
How does it feel to date your dad?
Randomize
