dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
