New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
My feet surprised me
Randomize
