let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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