I got chris browned last night
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize
