Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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