hotel room ftw
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
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