I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
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