Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
dude i'm inner monologue high
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
