We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
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