oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
